And if I joined the social whirl

Became procurer of young girls

Then i would have my own bordellos

My record would be number one

And I'd sell records by the ton

All sung by many other fellows

My name would then be handsome Jack

And I'd sell boats of opium

Whisky that came from Twickenham

Authentic queers

And phony virgins

If I had banks on every finger

A finger in every country

And every country ruled by me

I'd still know where I'd want to be

Locked up inside my opium den

Surrounded by some china men

I'd sing the song that I sang then

About the time they called me "Jacky"